Throwback To This Lady Stabbing Her Husband With A Ceramic Squirrel When He Forgot To Buy Beer

If there’s one thing you don’t do, it’s forget the beer.

Four years ago, a South Carolina woman was so pissed her man forgot the beer, she stabbed his forgetful ass with a ceramic squirrel. And yes, this was on Christmas Eve.

According to the police report, Williams’ 41-year-old husband set out to buy some beer late at night, but he returned home empty-handed because the stores were closed. That enraged Williams (which it should), and as her husband made himself a sandwich, she picked up the ceramic squirrel and conked him over the head with it. Then she stabbed him in the chest with it, the report said.

The man fled to a neighbor’s home to call 911, and when officers arrived shortly after midnight — on Christmas Day by now — they found him covered in blood with cuts on his shoulder and face, according to the report. When he took off his shirt, they found a big gash in his chest, it said.

She got charged with battery and had a $10,000 bond. Maybe her “man” won’t forget the beer anymore.

Whiskey Riff is the most entertaining country site…ever.