Creole Williams made it like nobody else, and Bocephus would send it to his friend in the New York City— homemade wine has been popping up in classic country songs for years. Making it probably requires lots of skill, time, and precision, right? Not necessarily. There’s lots of different ways to go about making it, some being much harder than others. For beginners who want to try it out, it can actually be a very simple, three-ingredient process. This is the most bare-bones way to make your own booze.
Step One: Gathering Ingredients
4 cups sugar, one packet yeast, 16 cups of fruit, a gallon jug and a balloon
That’s it. That’s all that’s needed to make your own wine. Who knew, right? These ingredients are all readily available in most grocery stores. Fruit choice will not only determine the flavor, but also how much fruit you’ll need to buy. Grapes, watermelon and any kind of berry are all good choices. For the adventurous, pineapple is also an option.
Step Two: Juice the Fruit
This is the longest part of the process. Get a large bowl and dump in as much fruit as it will hold. Beat it to a pulp, literally. Continue to crush the fruit until the optimal amount of juice has been extracted, then strain it. After that, it can be placed directly into the empty jug. Repeat this process until the jug is mostly full, leaving room for the sugar and yeast. (If this process is really holding you back from achieving your dreams of making wine, one can of frozen fruit extract and water can act as a substitute.)
Step Three: Top Off the Jug
Once the jug is almost filled, add in the sugar and the yeast. Securely fasten the balloon to the mouth of the jug so that its won’t come off. Wrap a rubber band around it as an added precaution.
Step Four: Celebrate Your Mastery of Wine
In about six weeks, you’ll have your very own wine. The balloon on the jug will fill with gas as the fermentation process begins, and will fluctuate from full to half-full throughout. When the balloon is completely empty again, the wine is ready to drink.
Step Five: Bottling and Presentation (Optional)
There are those who will be inclined to immediately find the bottom of the jug, and God be with those determined to do so. However, if you want to flaunt your new skills to friends, presentation is key. Wine bottles are relatively cheap to buy in bulk, just make sure you get the right sized corks to accompany it. Once the balloon is empty and the wine is ready, it’s best to bottle and cork it right after removing the balloon. Like all wine, the longer it stays corked, the better the flavor. Your friends will likely enjoy the wine better from a bottle, unaware that the process of making it was a small step above how they do it in prison. Enjoy!
Now, you know what song to put on…
Whiskey Riff is the most entertaining country site…ever.