Blackout On One Glass Thanks To Costco’s Monster 4-Foot Wine Glass

I love Costco.

You can get anything there, literally anything. Go there for an industrial size can of cheese balls and come out with a knock-off, but kick ass new jacket, 47 lbs of ground beef, a casket that I don’t need (knock on wood), new rims for the Jeep I don’t have, 6 gallons of shampoo, a remote-control helicopter, somebody’s baby… it’s anarchy.

Their latest internet sensation, standing at 46 inches tall, is a giant-ass wine glass for, here’s the kicker, “decoration.”

While their display appears to suggest that this wine glass is to be used for decorative purposes, i.e. filling it with corks, Christmas baubles or plants, we all know we can’t wait to fill that MF’er with as much vino as humanly fucking possible and go to work. Everyone has that one buzzkill of a friend that’s always saying some shit like “I can only have one glass, I have to be up early because I have this (insert pretentious thing I do way too early in the morning so I feel better than you) thing to do tomorrow.” Next time they pull that shit, hit ’em with this monster.

I haven’t done a case race since like 2010, but hell, grab a few friends, few of these bad boys and whole shit-load of wine… now we have a party. First team to finish dies wins.