Taylor Decker Allegedly Failed To Report On The Lions’ Successful 2-Point Conversion, But That Ain’t What It Looked Like

Lions Cowboys game

The ever-frisky, super-tricky, hyper-aggressive Detroit Lions got a vicarious second wind from Dan Campbell’s exorbitant caffeine intake, drove down the field in the last minute against the Dallas Cowboys, and appeared to call a winning two-point conversion on a Jared Goff pass to eligible tackle Taylor Decker.

Problem was, Decker apparently didn’t report himself as an eligible receiver to the officiating crew. Or so they said once they threw the flag.

In retrospect, something looks very, very fishy if you ask me:

LORD I can’t wait for the league’s explanation on this one! Oh, wait… Here’s one from Dan Campbell himself:

Campbell PREPARED THE CREW before the game for this exact scenario — and it actually happened! What!? That just makes it all the more insane!

Taylor Decker’s number is 68. If Decker reported as eligible and, um, caught the ball, what was the penalty for?

Wow. Our beautiful hunk of an American man Dan could barely stay at the podium he was so ticked off.

Where’ the asterisk in this graphic, by the way?

Leave it up to the refs to f*ck this up. Of course they did. You could say “THE NFL IS RIGGED/SCRIPTED” and go down that whole conspiracy theory rabbit hole. My take? It’s just sheer incompetence of the highest (lowest?) order.

The officials saved Mike McCarthy from galaxy braining his way into a medley of stupid passing attempts instead of running the clock out to give the Lions this opportunity in the first place. It’s the epitome of a comedy of errors.

Even better? This particular crew of old head unathletic idiots has had their woes before.

What’s so cool about Campbell is that he didn’t give a damn about not getting that two-pointer the first time. They pushed his team back to the Cowboys 7. Still went for it again. Micah Parsons jumped offside, so they got a third crack at it.

Sadly, Jared Goff almost one-hopped the ball to the backup tight end, who would’ve scored with an on-target throw.

Kind of a shame, too, that Campbell could’ve kicked a field goal earlier in the game, but pressed his luck one too many times by failing to score on a 4th and Goal from the 5 (if memory serves) after extending the possession with one of the ballsiest fake punts in NFL history:

If that doesn’t hit, it could be 14-3 Dallas real quick, and the game takes on a whole other tone.

As someone who played against CeeDee Lamb in the fantasy championship tonight, it sucked seeing him go off for 13 catches, 227 yards and a 92-yard TD on what should’ve been a safety on Dak Prescott except Derrick Barnes lost his damn mind and whiffed on him with a clean shot right through the A gap!

Come on, man. You got money on the Cowboys or something?? Goodell should investigate Barnes’ betting activity while he’s looking into this latest officiating fiasco.

So I guess the game could’ve gone either way given those circumstances. But like…the bottom line is, the refs robbed Detroit of a victory. Was it because the Pistons ended their 28-game losing streak on Saturday, too, and the secret Illuminati who runs the sports world was too afraid what might happen in the Motor City tonight and/or on New Year’s Eve with that much winning afoot?

Well, guess what? Joke’s on you, Jerry Jones, if you paid off the refs to coup yourself a win in a prime-time game. Detroit fans are about to LOSE IT. Sure, the Lions already won the NFC North, but this one had massive implications for their pursuit of the No. 1 seed in the NFC. What an absolute debacle of a sham of a travesty that the zebras took matters into their own completely incapable hands and mucked the whole thing up.

Why am I, along with millions of other spectators, not surprised?

A beer bottle on a dock



A beer bottle on a dock