Shohei Ohtani Is Headed To The Dodgers, & The Reactions Highlight How Ridiculous His 10-Year, $700 Million Contract Really Is

Shohei Ohtani
OAKLAND, CALIFORNIA - SEPTEMBER 03: Shohei Ohtani #17 of the Los Angeles Angels walks back to the dugout after striking out swinging against the Oakland Athletics in the top of the ninth inning at RingCentral Coliseum on September 03, 2023 in Oakland, California. Atheltics won the game 10-6. (Photo by Thearon W. Henderson/Getty Images)

In perhaps the biggest transactional news in modern baseball history, former Los Angeles Angels superstar Shohei Ohtani is actually going to be based in LA going forward after signing with the Dodgers on Saturday.

Class act that Ohtani is, he’s deferring a lot of his money — whatever that means exactly, I’m sure I don’t know — but the bottom line is, the man is about to make SEVEN-HUNDRED MILLION DOLLARS over the span of 10 seasons.

Joining the Dodgers was kind of a no-brainer for Ohtani. At the very least, he’s not playing for The Angels Angels of Anaheim anymore and toiling away in obscurity alongside Mike Trout. What a colossal failure the Angels organization is. Somebody ring up Theo Epstein to turn that mother around. PS: I’m just poking a little fun at the Anaheim vs. LA thing. They’re like 26 miles apart. Not a big deal. OK moving on.

I’m sure fans of any other team who felt they had a realistic shot are bummed Ohtani won’t be rocking their uniform. Not gonna lie, having Ohtani in the greater New York City area for the Mets or Yankees would’ve been a dream scenario. However, it’s hard to turn down this kind of money, not to mention, the Dodgers have three 100-win seasons in the past four years. The exception? A COVID-shortened 2020 campaign when they won the freaking World Series.

Funnily enough, amid all the speculation around Ohtani’s future and the MLB insiders who were angling for the official scoop, it was the pitching-hitting dual-threat stud himself who broke the news via the GRAM:

…But like, hold on a second. Forget the on-field implications of Ohtani’s arrival. Disregard the fact that he can’t pitch until 2025 due to injury. We’re all reading that contract correctly, right?

$700 million. That’s a full nine-a** figures more than the $600 million earnings potential Jon Rahm has with LIV Golf. From what I understand, Rahm has to at least earn that by pledging his undying fealty (IYKYK) to LIV for the remainder of his career. Who knows what pro golf will look like in a matter of weeks, never mind years? OK not to get too far afield.

I’ll be your sort of de facto Twitter factotum and document just how absurd the money is that Ohtani is about to make. How about what it’d mean to pay an NFL quarterback a corresponding/proportionate amount?

And that’s the mere tip of the iceberg, friends.

Were I Ohtani, I’d perhaps consider going to a tax-free state, because Uncle Sam is about to take a big bite out of his annual salary. However, being part of a World Series contender, not having to move far if at all, and benefiting from the massive LA market should only help Ohtani in the grand scheme of things.

As for the $700 million price tag, I mean, I guess the MLB market dictates that’s what he’s worth. Remember, the Dodgers are essentially getting an ace pitcher and a top-10 hitter (arguably better than top-10 but at least that good, right?). The Evil Empire of the West is, for all intents and purposes, paying for two players in one with this unprecedented mega deal for Ohtani. So it’s more like two contracts worth $350 million apiece. That would still be among the richest deals of all-time. Just so happens that Ohtani can get it done on the mound and at the dish to such a mind-blowing level that he’s worth the both of those.

Congrats, Mr. Ohtani. Do cool things with all that dough!

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