Dear Jim Carrey: Please Don’t Retire Until You Play George Jones’ Multiple Personalities In The Biopic Of My Dreams

George Jones, Jim Carrey are posing for a picture
George Pimentel/Michael Ochs Archives via Getty Images

Just hear me out…

Someone tell Jim Carrey that Sonic the Hedgehog 2 cannot be the last movie of his career.

Carrey recently told Access Hollywood that he intends to retire (or at least to take a break from Hollywood for a while) following his second time playing Sonic villain Dr. Robotnik. However, when told that Dolly Parton had him in mind to play her longtime collaborator, Porter Wagoner, in a future Dolly biopic, Carrey left some wiggle room in those plans.

“It depends. If the angels bring some sort of script that’s written in gold ink that says to me that it’s going to be really important for people to see, I might continue down the road. But I’m taking a break.”

As much as I loved the Sonic franchise and my Sega Genesis growing up, and as much as I think Carrey would kill it as Porter Wagoner, there is one and only one role that Jim Carrey is missing from his illustrious acting career that will give him a proper send off into retirement: George Jones.

This is a selfish opinion. As Jim said in his Access Hollywood interview, he doesn’t need anything more from his career.

But I do.

I need to see master of physical comedy Jim Carrey act out a three-way conversation between George Jones’ famous multiple personalities: “Jones,” “The Old Man,” and “Dee-Doodle the Duck.” A ridiculous situation like that is tailor-made for the man who burst onto the comedy scene thanks to his otherworldly ability to transform himself into multiple people at the same time.

I need to see award-winning dramatic actor Jim Carrey explore the deep, psychological and addiction issues that Jones’ dealt with throughout his legendary yet troubled life.

Carrey showed Oscar potential with his dramatic roles on The Truman Show, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, and Man on the Moon. Perhaps a turn as The Possum (and his inner ducks and demons) could help Carrey break through with the Best Actor Oscar that has eluded him so far.

And I also need to see Buzzcut Jim Carrey resurrect his look from Me, Myself, and Irene, when he actually looked exactly like a young George Jones. It’s uncanny… and perfect.

I know that a George Jones miniseries wrapped production in April this year.

George and Tammy, featuring Michael Shannon as Jones opposite Jessica Chastain’s Tammy Wynette, will premiere on Spectrum TV later this year. And while I’m stoked enough for that premiere that I’ll keep paying my Spectrum cable bill until it airs, I’m worried that it may leave me wanting more Jones.

Based on Georgette Jones’ book The Three of Us: Growing Up with Tammy and George, the miniseries promises to focus on their tumultuous relationship. Michael Shannon is a talented actor who is even doing his own singing for the role, so I’m confident he’ll be a great Possum. But I get the sense, since Jessica Chastain is clearly the bigger star here, that this will be a Tammy-centric series.

That’s all great, and the world needs to see more of the Tammy Wynette story. But there is so much depth and material in George Jones’ life alone, I think there’s room in the world for at least one more Possum-centric film.

And in my opinion, there’s room on Jim Carrey’s IMDB page for the lead role he was born to play.

In fact, I so badly want to see Jim Carrey take a crack at Dee-Doodle the Duck, I might just take a shot at that script myself.

Now I wonder where I could get my hands on some gold ink….

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