With just a few days until we collectively gather around the dinner table to stuff our mouths with food and our eyeballs with football, one (myself) could argue that Thanksgiving is the greatest holiday of them all. I mean, when do you really make stuffing? Once a year… Why? I don’t know. It’s a simple, yet incredible dish that we only eat once a year for some ridiculous reason, but that’s what makes it so special.
And whether it’s deep frying the bird in the driveway, making a special, signature dish, maybe a little backyard football, everybody has their Thanksgiving traditions. But some of you freaks out there are running (no pun intended) with one tradition that I just cannot get behind. A turkey trot? HARD pass…
And look, if you’re the type to get up and go for a run on Thanksgiving, more power to you. I’m more than happy to drink some beers with you at the finish line (and by finish line I mean when you get bac home), but I’m not doing it, I’m just not. Luckily, I didn’t marry into the kind of family that does shit like that. And now that I have a toddler at home and another on the way, there’s no chance in hell that my wife is every gonna wanna sign us up for something like that. At least not anytime soon.
But others, not so much…
Just watch the soul leave this poor b*stard’s body when his wife tells him she signed them up for a turkey trot. She’s kidding, but he doesn’t know that. And while I enjoy watching him suffer through this argument, I enjoy his firm rejection of the idea even more. It’s exactly the kind of husband I aspire to be.
As a married guy, it can be tough to tell your wife “no” on certain things, and if you want to keep your marriage running smooth, you gotta pick your battles. Sounds cliche, but it’s true. And a turkey trot IS one of those battles.
Remember men, you can say no to the turkey trot. I know it’s hard, but stand your ground… she won’t divorce you.