Mentalist Oz Pearlman Is The Only Man On Earth Who Can Get In Joe Burrow’s Head

Joe Burrow
Oz The Mentalist

Something Bengals-related! Let’s go! I’ve covered Oz Pearlman’s mentalism exploits in the past, including last week when he visited the Michigan Wolverines. Probably won’t make it a weekly thing, but then again, I didn’t anticipate Oz pulling up to my NFL team of choice, so here we are.

Also, if this routine were a step down from what transpired last week, I’d consider not covering it. But I’m over here legit yelling, “WHAT!?!?” and I’m sure my neighbors are wondering if I’m OK.

Joe Burrow is unflappable. You can hit him to the point where he’s probably pissing blood after the game and he will not relent. He dragged a horrible offensive line to a Super Bowl berth. The former No. 1 overall pick has fought through multiple injuries that have robbed him of a full, healthy NFL offseason. Doesn’t matter. He’s still out here winning left and right.

So yeah, it takes a lot to get into the psyche of one Joseph Lee Burrow. He may have met his match in Oz Pearlman, who guessed not once, not twice, but three times as to who he wanted to throw the ball to. All Joe Brrr did was take a quick, 360 spin of a glance around the room at his pass-catchers, and Oz managed to deduce who he’d throw it to every time.

The craziest part was when Burrow faked throwing to tight end Tanner Hudson, only to settle on his best pal Ja’Marr Chase. Before those actions were executed, Oz predicted it would happen exactly that way on his whiteboard.

Burrow got to guess Tyler Boyd’s first-ever kiss — which grade it was in and the name of the girl. Had zero knowledge of it going in. I don’t know how Burrow pulled that off, but Oz was confident he would. And he did.

…But maybe the craziest thing of all was the top-of-the-act misdirect when Orlando Brown Jr. appeared to go against Oz’s intuition. When asked what the last drink he remembered grabbing off the shelf was, Brown said it was an orange soda. From this unassuming — dark arts-infused? — brown paper bag, Oz lifted out a Coke can…and proceeded to somehow pour orange soda out of it into a glass.

Oz cannot and will not be denied.

A beer bottle on a dock



A beer bottle on a dock