Taylor Swift-Brittany Mahomes Handshake Upstages Chargers Superfan, Merrianne Do, In Kansas City

Taylor Swift and Brittany MAhomes
CBS

Can Arrowhead Stadium even handle this much high-profile fandom?

Taylor Swift cheering on her boo Travis Kelce with Brittany Mahomes, the wife of Kelce’s quarterback/highest-paid player in NFL history, Patrick Mahomes?

The T-Swift-Brittany Mahomes exchange is wild enough. Combine that with the reemergence of viral sensation/Bolts fanatic Merrianne Do, and I don’t know what to even do with myself.

This much supreme feminine energy is enough to threaten the faux-alpha hardos who are trying to slug back Bud Heavies and enjoy their late-afternoon-window football Sunday without these BROADS gracing their screens. Tough scene for those fellas.

Jackson Mahomes has been trying to get in the mix, and is standing in pretty close proximity to Swift. At least he’s sort of in the background and not joining in on these viral celebration routines. But I bet you anything he’s gritting his teeth, seething and crying on the inside about how much potential TikTok engagement he’s missing out on. You won’t catch me dead feeling sorry for that guy.

As for the football side of things, this Bolts-Chiefs AFC West clash hasn’t disappointed in the slightest. Explosive plays — to quote Jonathan Gannon, “SHOOM! SHOOM! SHOOM! SHOOM!” — all over the place, touchdowns everywhere, and unsurprisingly, I just saw the team coached by alleged defensive mastermind Brandon Staley gift Kansas City a pass interference penalty on, what, 2nd and 23 or 24? Sounds about right.

Whatever the Over/Under is on cutaways to Taylor Swift/Brittany Mahomes and/or Merrianne Do, hammer the Over. It’s not a real prop you can bet on. So what? Maybe use it as a drinking game, IDK. Go off. Let’s set it at 6.5 for Swift/Mahomes, 3.5 for our beloved Merrianne, and a second-half total of 10.5. I may be a bit audacious but then again, I guarantee you these cutaways drive mad TV ratings. I’m certain the NFL is loving it.

PS I’ve seen no fewer than three different spellings of Merrianne Do, I have crappy WiFi and I’m deeply confused as to which spelling is the proper one. I hope I got it right; if not, I apologize, ma’am. You’re a national treasure. Don’t let anyone tell you differently.

A beer bottle on a dock

STAY ENTERTAINED

A RIFF ON WHAT COUNTRY IS REALLY ABOUT

A beer bottle on a dock