Is This Grown Man Child Begging For MLB Autographs The Most Embarrassing Loser Of All Time?

A group of people posing for a photo

These are some of the most insufferable people – full stop.

Before we get to one of the most cringeworthy videos you’ll see all year, it’s time for a little story.

Back during the early 2000s around the age of 12 or so I went to a Cubs vs Phillies game at Wrigley Field. As I’m watching warmups, I see Dan Plesac tossing the ball around. Dan was born close to my birthplace in Indiana so I knew of him well and his long career.

I jumped at the opportunity to get a ball from a major leaguer.

I ran over, screamed his name, made eye contact (oh sh*t this is happening I thought), and he approached. Dan was super kind, came right over, tossed the ball right to me and…BOOM.

A grown man baby easily in his 60s and weighing about 300lbs railroads me with his Old Style and hot dog gut which was protruding from his stained polo shirt like the shell of a Galapagos turtle.

He took off as you’d expect, and lucky for him, no other adults were around to witness it.

I dusted myself off and enjoyed the game, eating some ice cream to wash away the what-ifs.

Then, I see this on Twitter.

A grown man throwing elbows at children as he begs for autographs at the MLB All-Star Game.

Look at the desperation on this guy’s face. JUST LOOK.

A group of people wearing baseball caps

Elbow right into that kid’s jaw. Double fisting baseballs in case he can fill two up (no player with a functioning brain is going to sign that). Probably has some fancy ball point pen that came in a case.

Props to the kid in the Dodgers jersey for telling him to back off, but it didn’t work. Analyzing the video closely, it doesn’t seem like he’s trying to get a ball signed for his kid, but he has gifted us with some Hall of Fame cringe.

Roll the tape.

A beer bottle on a dock



A beer bottle on a dock