Dairy Farmer Puts Ring On Cow’s Udder, Delivers The Least Romantic Proposal In Human History

A ring on a person's finger

There are plenty of reasons to believe that we might be doomed as a human race… and this is definitely up there.

A woman shared this photo to the Facebook group “That’s It, I’m Ring Shaming,” a group dedicated to awful engagement rings/proposals, and I think I can say this might be the most unapologetically redneck thing I’ve ever seen in my entire life.

And generally, I’m willing to embrace and even celebrate hilarious instances of redneck ingenuity, but this is just bad.

Like shamefully redneck…

The guy who proposed with the ring inside a can of Skoal is infinitely more romantic than you. He’s Ryan Gosling in The Notebook compared to you…

So, what did he do?

This dairy farmer, he put it on the udder…

A kitchen with a sink and a toaster oven

The bar is low fellas… the bar is LOW.

Even the folks from Good Morning Cleveland were mortified…

Cattle Rancher Shares Most Redneck Baby Announcement Ever

Here’s another announcement in the same vein as the udder proposal but, dare I say, with much better execution.

Pregnancy photos, gender reveals, engagement pics…  all endless opportunities to outdo each other in unnecessarily showing the world how weird you are.

The latest one making waves on the interwebs comes to us from Central Florida (shocker).

Now growing up in a farm town, I find this to actually be pretty damn funny, but the rest of the internet, not so much. Steven and Tori Dudley went full redneck with their new cattle insemination-inspired pregnancy photo captioning the photo with:

“When you mess with the bull, you get the horn.”

Any way you slice it, an arm-length latex glove is always going to make people uncomfortable, and although I’m sure most people don’t even know what the hell is going on in this picture, I got to hand it to them, they got creative.

I imagine once the baby is born, they’re gonna hook mom up to dairy milker and really run with it. Baby in a manger, mom on the milker, how about that for some newborn photos?

That’s first-ballot Redneck Hall of Fame if I’ve ever seen it.

And believe me, for better or worse, I’ve seen it…

A man and a woman

A beer bottle on a dock



A beer bottle on a dock