Bills Rookie Keon Coleman Is A Big Snack Guy & Might Have Even More Of A Sweet Tooth Than DK Metcalf

Keon Coleman
Buffalo Bills

It’s not like Keon Coleman can strut into the NFL, rip cigs like John Daly, and expect to be the Buffalo Bills’ WR1 as a rookie. When it comes to loading up his body with all kinds of sugary snacks, though, Coleman is such a supreme athlete with a rapid metabolism that he can burn that sh*t off and still flourish without any issue.

Or so it seems that’s how Coleman is going to roll. The former Florida State star once spoke about his fast food-centric pregame meal and made my insides vocalize in terror. I didn’t put it together until after the draft that Coleman was the same dude who looks to be the NFL’s next press conference superstar.

Coleman’s magnetic personality was on display in a podcast interview with ESPN insider Adam Schefter. He couldn’t limit himself to a top three list of snacks as Schefty requested, and got really deep in his analysis once pressed for scouting reports on the sweets.

“Sour Punch straws, Sweet Tart ropes, and Skittles of course. The purple Skittles, of course the purple Skittles. And then the Sweet Tart ropes, you’ve never had them? So they got the cherry punch, they got another pink one, they got twisted ones, and then they got one that come in the blue pack. It might be strawberry, I don’t remember. It’s a blue, and they got green apple. So they got the blue pack, they got a red pack, a pink pack, and a green pack. All of them are fire. And then you got the Sour Punch straws. I’ve been eating them joints since I was about 6-7 years old. You got the blue ones, the green ones, the purple ones, the red ones, and you get the watermelon. That’s only five. Hold on, you gotta give me five you can’t just give me three. Laffy Taffy, Now and Later, and oh, Airhead Xtremes — the green pack! Yeah, that’s my 6 right there.”

In case you’re unaware of the dietary habits of Seattle Seahawks Pro Bowl wideout DK Metcalf, he had Kevin Garnett legitimately concerned when he broke down the literal bags of candy he eats on a daily basis.

The funny thing is, Metcalf dunks all over NFL defensive backs because he’s just that ridiculous of an athlete. Maybe he fell to the second round of the draft because he disclosed his diet to teams during pre-draft interviews. Or maybe it really was more to do with his poor 3-cone drill and 20-yard shuttle times at the Combine. You know what else DK did in the Underwear Olympics? Ran a 4.33-second 40-yard dash, vertical leapt 40.5″, and put up 27 reps of 225 on the bench press with a 6-foot-3, 228-pound frame.

Coleman doesn’t have the top-end speed that Metcalf does (4.61 40), but he most definitely is a size-speed freak who should see his fair share of targets and be elevated by the play of Bills superstar quarterback Josh Allen. Since Buffalo opted to trade Stefon Diggs to Houston this offseason, Coleman has no choice but to step into a sizable role as a rookie. Adding to the pressure is the fact that the Bills traded back twice in the draft, as the Chiefs drafted Xavier Worthy and the Panthers picked Xavier Legette. Coleman was the 33rd overall pick, and behind Worthy and Legette, was the eighth receiver off the board.

Given how loaded this rookie wide receiver class is, if I were the Bills, I’d get a personal chef and the team dietician on Coleman’s case ASAP. If he wants to stand out as one of the great playmakers from that crowded pack of talented prospects, a better diet would probably go a long way.

That said, Coleman has junk-fooded himself into being the first pick in the second round of the latest draft, so it’s working out pretty well for him. I guess there are far worse vices to have away from the field. Evidently, gorging oneself with candy hasn’t really hindered Metcalf’s career. Only time will tell if Coleman can follow suit, or if he makes some adjustments on what he’s putting into his body.

A beer bottle on a dock

STAY ENTERTAINED

A RIFF ON WHAT COUNTRY IS REALLY ABOUT

A beer bottle on a dock