Jaromir Jagr Thanks Girlfriend, Who Was “Too Young To Remember” Him On The Penguins, During Jersey Retirement Ceremony

Jaromir Jagr
NHL/@dominikabranisova

During some of my formative childhood years North of the Border, hockey was a big deal, and there were few superstars in the sport cooler than Jaromir Jagr. The Pittsburgh Penguins forward and his signature mullet went down as one of the NHL’s most prolific scorers, with a total of 1,921 career points. That’s second to only Wayne Gretzky.

To give the uninitiated an idea of how legendary this guy is, Jagr helped the Penguins win back-to-back Stanley Cups in 1991 and 1992, won four consecutive scoring titles starting about half a decade later, and wound up playing a total of 24 seasons at the highest level of professional hockey. In his age-43 season, he was named to his final All-Star team on merit, for during the 2015-16 campaign for the Florida Panthers, he wound up with 27 goals and 39 assists for 66 points in 79 games played.

Here’s a fitting stat to summarize Jagr’s legacy of longevity.

What’s even wilder is that, as of today, Jagr still plays in his native Czech Republic for the Kladno Knights.  This season, he’s registered four assists in 15 games. At 52 years old.

Whether it was simply an overdue coronation or Jagr’s insistence on knocking off any “retirement” talk since he is, in fact, still an active player, he returned to Pittsburgh on Sunday to have his No. 68 Penguins jersey hung from the rafters at PPG Paints Arena. Quite a scene, as Pens players rocked mullet wigs and took the ice with Jagr for a pregame skate.

But the one-liner to end all one-liners came when Jagr was giving his speech of gratitude, as you do for these sorts of occasions. During his thanking of folks, he shouted out his current girlfriend, model Dominika Branisova, who Google tells me is 29 years old. Thus, she was not alive when Jagr entered the NHL as a teenager, nor was she around for both of his Stanley Cup wins.

The super long pause is what really gets me. Then, after Jagr explains how his boo was too young to recall his time in Pittsburgh, he breaks the ice by saying, “But I told her all the stories, so don’t worry about it!” We weren’t worried, Jaromir. Not in the slightest.

That “legacy of longevity” I alluded to earlier? Apparently it doesn’t only apply to Jagr’s hockey-playing prowess. He’s still got it in spades when it comes to dating, that’s for sure.

Stumbled upon some old footage from one of Prime Jaromir’s birthday parties. Don’t think you’ll be surprised to get the general lay of the land on how those festivities went down.

Even nowadays Jagr looks like a damn catch, so props to Dominika Branisova for reeling in this man, who might be in the conversation as the hockey GOAT if not for The Great One Gretzky’s greatness.

In case you’d like to get more familiar with Dominika, here’s a small sampler of her IG to play us out. I gotta say, she keeps it classy.

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