The Carolina Panthers Won Their 2nd Game Of The Season, But Nobody Was There To See It

Panthers game

The Carolina Panthers reportedly won a football game on Sunday. A 9-7 bloodbath against the Atlanta Falcons. At least the Panthers spoiled their division rivals’ playoff hopes, right?

I guess if I didn’t see #FireArthurSmith pop up in my X/Twitter feed, I would’ve never known the Falcons lost to a team who entered Week 15 with a 1-12 record.

And I’m not so sure this isn’t some dramatic ploy by the NFL scriptwriters to add intrigue to the NFL’s worst division. Maybe this beyond-disappointing loss to a terrible opponent is what shocks Atlanta into gear, as they win out to claim the division crown.

No but really. It’d behoove the league to do this. Make the optics around Bryce Young going first overall a little better. Give Carolina fans a glimmer of hope. If there are any left, that is. What am I getting at? Y’all, I don’t know who actually witnessed the Panthers’ win. I really don’t. This could be a full-on propaganda piece put out by Roger Goodell’s office to add more intrigue to the rest of the football season and the “race” for the No. 1 overall draft pick.

I’ve reached full “this” status when it comes to whatever went down in Charlotte this afternoon:

Like I’m pretty sure we’re all getting duped. No way. I stand tall against authority, which it is our patriotic duty as Americans to question. Some guy who looks like the guy in the still frame from the video above said something like that once.

No but really, doesn’t this look staged??

The cheapest ticket to this Panthers-Falcons game was 45 cents. You read that right. I’m just saying. This is all sketchy AF.

Panthers owner David Tepper has to already be on the hunt for his new head coach after one-and-done-ing Frank Reich. It was less than a one-and-done, actually. Much like Jets offensive coordinator Nathaniel Hackett last year in Denver. Nothing about this job would be appealing to me as a prospective candidate. You have an impatient, inexperienced owner, the smallest franchise QB hopeful in NFL history by far, and a culture that’s sabotaging any foundation that is there at present.

If Jim Harbaugh really wants to prove himself as the builder of a winner everywhere he goes and desires the maximum challenge possible, Carolina is the place for him to be. No matter what happens at Michigan in the College Football Playoff, Harbaugh is the type of proven, splashy hire Tepper and plenty of other owners in his spot would spring for. Seriously, if Harbaugh turns this wreck of a Panthers group into a playoff team right away, he might be the best pure coach of all-time this side of Belichick.

OK anyway, never mind. This game apparently happened. An official Panthers reporter is saying the players heard the fans. There were enough witnesses to acknowledge the win. Congrats, Carolina. I guess?

How dire must things be when the spin from arguably your most visible beat writer is like this for Bryce Young? Hot damn.

A beer bottle on a dock



A beer bottle on a dock