“Bored” Security Guard Decided To Draw Eyes On An $800K Painting Of Faceless People

A room with paintings on the wall

I’ll be the first to say, I don’t have a fiddler’s fuckin’ clue how to interpret abstract art, nor will I ever try too.

Seriously, you’ll be walking through an upscale restaurant or hotel and see a painting on the wall of a square with polka dots surrounding it and it’s titled “Pretty Flowers.”


Ask somebody who works at the establishment and they’ll say it’s a half a million dollar painting.

Maybe I’m simply not openminded enough, but a painting of a square with polka dots should be titled “A Square With Polka Dots.”

With my lack of knowledge of the abstract art world, it’s good to see I have a fellow companion out there who’s as clueless as me…

However, this man lacks something I do have:

Common sense.

According to the Daily Mail, a security guard was on his first day of the job at a Russian art gallery, when he noticed a painting of three faceless people on the wall.

Apparently the thought crossed his mind:

“Hm, those people need eyes, how are they supposed to see?”

The bored security guard then took a pencil, and drew eyes on the faceless people painting, titled “The World as Non-Objectivity,” which just so happened to cost over $800k.

C’mon man, you’re working at an art gallery.

And if the number of signs that say “do not touch” aren’t enough, you have to have the common sense to leave the art as is.

Sure enough, the company had to take the art to get restored.

Thank God Leporskaya, the artist of the painting, has already passed away, because she would’ve had a damn heart attack on the spot.

A beer bottle on a dock



A beer bottle on a dock