Forrest Gump’s best good friend Bubba Blue was a shrimp connoisseur.
He said you can make “shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, shrimp soup,” the list goes on and on. However, I don’t think Bubba had Cinnamon Toast Crunch on his list of shrimp delicacies.
According to TMZ, writer/producer Jensen Karp was stoked to open his fresh box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch… I mean, who wouldn’t be? But little did he know, what he was about to find in the box just might scar him for life.
Karp opened his brand new box and began pouring it into a bowl, and he found SHRIMP TAILS. Yes, you heard that correctly. Not even full shrimp, just the tails. How the hell does this happen? Was this a sick joke from one of the workers? Is General Mills Cereal a part of some shrimp smuggling scam that we don’t know about?
Karp was obviously mortified by what he found, so he tweeted out a picture of the shrimp tails to Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Perhaps the most disturbing thing is how Cinnamon Toast Crunch responded:
We’re sorry to see what you found! We would like to report this to our quality team and replace the box. Can you please send us a DM to collect more details? Thanks!
— Cinnamon Toast Crunch (@CTCSquares) March 22, 2021
Sorry, we’ll get you another box? Uhhhhhh….
We understand your concern. We promise you that our team will look into this and get to the bottom of it – but in the meantime, we want to do everything we can to make this right. We'll need further details to research.
— Cinnamon Toast Crunch (@CTCSquares) March 22, 2021
Ok, we’ll after further investigation with my eyes, these are cinnamon coated SHRIMP TAILS, you weirdos. I wasn’t all that mad until you now tried to gaslight me? https://t.co/7DmADmoqUt pic.twitter.com/rSLE60pvoy
— Jensen Karp (@JensenKarp) March 22, 2021
Accumulation of sugar? Sounds like Cinnamon Toast Crunch thinks he’s making his whole thing up… I mean, what other details do they want? What kind of shrimp did it come from?
However, the story doesn’t quite end here.
Karp and his wife (who you probably will recognize) dug deeper into the box, and it only got worse:
Also, many of the squares have black marks, and some are dyed red? And yes, I ate a bowl before noticing all this. pic.twitter.com/Y9WWmsTznP
— Jensen Karp (@JensenKarp) March 22, 2021
UPDATE: my wife has a stronger stomach than me and checked the OTHER bag in the family pack. This one seems taped up (?) and also appears to include…(I don’t even want to say it)…dental floss. pic.twitter.com/yKPkpx7PWq
— Jensen Karp (@JensenKarp) March 23, 2021
Shrimp tails, rope, dental floss, black and red shit on the cereal, taped up bags. I could see this happening in a box of off-brand Cinnamon Toast Crunch (but even that would be a stretch), but not the actual thing. Now I’m interested to see what happens next. A boycott of Cinnamon Toast Crunch? An FBI investigation? Both?
To me, it looks like a mouse made a home in the Cinnamon Toast Crunch and brought some of the other random shit in there, but I just hope my guy Karp gets some answers. And it’s safe to say that I won’t be eating Cinnamon Toast Crunch ever again…
Oh and fun fact, Jensen Karp is Topanga’s husband. The writer/producer is married to Danielle Fishel who played Topanga on the popular ’90s show Boy Meets World.