TikTok Goes Crazy After Man Claims He Witnessed Alleged Alien Attack At Miami Mall – Only To Inform Everyone He Was Trolling

Miami mall

There’s wild speculation flying around on social media that a massive police presence at a Miami mall was not to break up an alleged fight among youths, who were also said to be wreaking havoc and setting off fireworks, which could’ve been mistaken for gunfire.

Instead, people on social media are asserting that “reports” of “shadow aliens” who are eight to 10 feet tall were seen roaming about.

You gotta read the way some people are writing about this. Straight-up Crazytown. Bananaland.

I can’t say that I can fully explain the “shadowy creature” being captured in front of all those police cars, but it could easily be some janky VFX creation by someone who manipulated the initial footage. Here’s what a Miami PD spokesperson told TMZ:

If only these people could think critically for one second. If aliens were going to reveal themselves to the world after all this time, they’d probably be a little less conspicuous about it. You’re telling me if they had the sophisticated technology for interstellar travel that they’d clumsily be found out once they got here? In a Miami mall of all places?

There’s just no way. But don’t let that stop people from running with a narrative.

Trust me. I want to believe. The massive police presence is sketchy. In fact, if you just took people at their word on Twitter, you might begin to believe all this was true, too.

HOWEVER. We run into a problem where the big smoking gun a lot of people are citing in this alleged mass extraterrestrial encounter is a witness who totally made his story up. Don’t get me wrong. It’s compelling, even convincing! An X account with over 100,000 followers put sosa.pippen’s video out mere hours ago as a credible account of events. Not putting “alleged” in front of the misspelled “eyewitness” is the cherry on top:

Alas…sosa.pippen on TikTok admitted to lying about the whole thing on Friday morning.

@sosa.pippen♬ original sound – sosa pippen

Dude has never been to Miami in his life. LOL. His actual bio on TikTok reads as follows, “Just trust u…nothing or nobody else. (Side note) I was dropped off here in a 🛸 .”

A UFO emoji is the punctuating end of his TikTok bio. Guess nobody bothered to vet that far. And just read the comments on his retraction video (he took down the original “alien witness” one). The vast majority of commenters are of the opinion that some men in black suits came to him, forced him to take the first vid down, and that he’s being silenced by the government for speaking the truth.

Let’s let Uncle Colin weigh in on the mass hysteria. Couldn’t say it much better myself.

Again, why there was such a massive police presence, I couldn’t tell you. Just seems pretty unlikely that “ALIENS!” was the reason. I hesitate to present any more conspiratorial rhetoric from the keyboard warriors on Twitter who insist the end is nigh. Just to cover all my bases, mad respect to you aliens for coming here, if you are here, and had a logistical meltdown on when you were going to reveal yourselves.

While we’re here, I guess I’ll toss in something music industry-adjacent to the alien/unexplained phenomenon discourse. If you’ve never heard the chilling story about Smashing Pumpkins frontman Billy Corgan’s encounter with a shapeshifter, he talked about it several years ago on The Howard Stern Show. I don’t know. It’s a hell of an imaginative tale if it ain’t true.

You wanna see an Earth-based alien, though? Check out Victor Wembanyama. I can’t bring you here for aliens and not show you what the real thing looks like (this is meant as the highest compliment to Wemby, to be clear).

@wemby My POV : How I see the basketball court 👀🏀 . . . #wembanyama #victorwembanyama #wemby #basketball #ballin #pov #mypov #nba #ballislife🏀 #fyp #pourtoi ♬ son original – Victor Wembanyama

@wemby Summer is almost over 🧘🏽‍♂️ . . #wembanyama #victorwembanyama #wemby #pov #mypov #yogaflow #yogapose #splits #basketball #stretchingyogaa ♬ son original – Victor Wembanyama

A beer bottle on a dock



A beer bottle on a dock