“I Hope That’s Not Live” – Luka Doncic’s Press Conference Awkwardly Interrupted By Loud Sex Sounds From The Locker Room

Luke Doncic
Dallas Mavericks

Luka Doncic somehow had the capacity to carry on with his press conference after such a surprising, sultry interruption. That’s almost more impressive than stealing a road win in Game 2 against the Oklahoma City Thunder with a sprained knee.

All Luka could muster when the sounds of probable pornography broke out from the locker room was to bow his head, and then say, “I hope that’s not live.”

Either one of his Mavericks teammates is a savage prankster, or somebody was fiddling around with the Bluetooth and made an all-time gaffe. We need to find the culprit for this. Who on the Mavs would do such a thing? I could almost immediately rule out Kyrie Irving. For as outlandish as he is as a human being, that doesn’t strike me as Kyrie behavior. Dude is too zen and has transcended the mundane. No way he’s firing up some postgame porn.

My money is on one of the young, dumb, full of it early 20-somethings on Dallas’ roster. Rookie big man Dereck Lively II is a prime suspect. I’m kidding. Not going to sling around too much speculation about who made the amateur blunder/all-time prank.

The thing is, Luka is unfazed by pretty much anything. Be it audible porn blasted in the locker room while he’s at the postgame podium, multiple injuries, or heckling Thunder fans who talked smack about his family.

Luka may only be 25 years old, but he’s been a professional basketball player since, what, his mid-teens? He went for 29 points, 10 boards and seven assists in Thursday’s 119-110 victory. I don’t fully understand this widespread notion that Luka doesn’t “impact winning” for someone with his superstar reputation. Really? Is the primary objective of basketball not to put the ball in the basket? And did he not lead the NBA in scoring this season whilst finishing second in assists?

I don’t know what more Luka could do as a playmaker. His defense has also improved, but his injured knee and nagging ankle issues are hindering his ability on that end of the court.

We’ll see if his body can hold up for what looks to be a series that could go the full seven games. At the moment, the Mavs have wrested back home-court advantage away from OKC with Games 3 and 4 to come in Dallas

. After this press conference, however, I’m almost more interested in seeing if a valiant beat reporter will expose the loud porn watcher than I am in who’ll advance to the Western Conference Finals.

A beer bottle on a dock



A beer bottle on a dock