Shirtless Bills Fan Has The Time Of His Life Shoveling Snow At Highmark Stadium For $20 An Hour

Matt Fitzgerald·
CULTURE
·
Buffalo Bills fans
@wonderofitall

Buffalo, New York, seems like the last place on Earth that would postpone an NFL playoff game due to severe weather.

As the Buffalo Bills shared yesterday from Highmark Stadium, however, it really does look like hosting the Pittsburgh Steelers at 1 p.m. ET Sunday as scheduled would’ve been impossible.

Conditions were so bad that a travel ban was imposed to ensure that fans wouldn’t put themselves in danger trying to get to Buffalo for the Bills’ matchup with the Pittsburgh Steelers. Thankfully, the greater local community is full of good Samaritans who are willing to do whatever it takes to guarantee a home playoff game, as opposed to a rescheduled, off-site, neutral-field situation.

Thanks to the wonders of social media, we have footage here of a Bills fan making a custom slip n’ slide out of the inclement elements while helping out his team, and you absolutely love to see it.

I would do the exact same thing in this situation, and I’m sure you would too. Well, minus the whole shirtless thing. No chance, Lance. I’m bundling the hell up. Apparently people in Western New York are built different. No wonder Josh Allen is such a perfect fit as the Bills’ quarterback. He epitomizes that phrase.

If you could say that you helped clear the way for fans and players to enjoy the postseason, you’d probably help the Bills shovel snow for free. Twenty dollars an hour for this temporary gig of voracious manual labor? That’s the fleeting dream of a job.

Hopefully we’ll see some decent football after the blowouts from Saturday’s doubleheader. Those games confirmed that Texans QB CJ Stroud is HIM and that Tua Tagovailoa may not be the guy in Miami, or so most of George W. Bush’s Internets would have you believe.

I just wonder if Monday leaves enough time for things to clear out. This video from Buffalo was from about an hour ago as of this writing:

I hinted yesterday that the NFL and Buffalo were worried that the bad conditions would favor the Steelers and that nobody wanted to see Pittsburgh advance to the Divisional Round, hence the postponed game. That was mostly a joke, as it was explained by New York Gov. Kathy Hochul that the delay was more about fan safety than anything else.

The thing is, you’ll never find a group of sports fans with less regard for their personal safety than those who pledge allegiance to Bills Mafia.

Love you guys, but so many of y’all are complete and utter morons. You probably know that already. Stunts like these come across as saddening, pseudo-death wishes. Guess that can happen when you’ve had so many close calls to win a Super Bowl and have fallen short every single time.

Not that I have much room to talk as a Bengals guy, but my goodness, at least I’m not trying to maim myself by getting loaded and crashing into flaming tables.

Aaaaaand just as I’m about to put a cap on this article, holy sh*t did this get even darker in a hurry.

Please avoid frostbite, Bills fans, and maybe don’t go shirtless. The weather alone should, in a perfect world if we should be so lucky, prevent you from lighting yourselves on fire, though I understand the compulsion to do so (I most definitely don’t).

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