I wish I could say I’m shocked, but I’m not.
Earlier this week, Blake Shelton shared the news that he had a brand new single dropping today titled “No Body.”
Of course, Shelton has become more recognizable as a coach on The Voice than he has for his own country music recently, and it largely feels like his career has been on autopilot.
However, donning a photoshopped mullet and ’90s-era country garb, the singer seemed to promise a return to his country roots and jump on this ’90s country trend with the release of this new single.
After half a decade of locking down the middle-aged moms market, Blake said this one made him feel like a teenager again:
“I get excited and feel like a kid every time we release new music. But this song in particular takes me back to the ’90s when I was in high school and first moved to Nashville, because it feels like what the music sounded like at that time.”
Could it be? For a slight second, I had myself fully convinced that we may get to relive the greatness of Shelton when he first burst onto the country music scene in the early 2000s, with songs like “Austin” and “Ol’ Red.”
And then the song dropped, and all hope was lost once again.
This song isn’t even remotely close to the greatness that was ’90s country.
We have a few references to John Anderson and Brooks & Dunn in the chorus, and some slide guitar licks, but where’s the fiddle? Where’s the pedal steel? Where’s the storytelling?
Not exactly the second coming of Alan Jackson right here, check out the second verse:
“Honeysuckle talking
Last call on me walking
Out there to a checkered cab
B-line to your condo
Conway on the stereo
Girl, I’d love to lay you down, down, down”
Is it the worst thing on country radio? No, not even close, but are we getting the ’90s country jam that the cover art would suggest? Hell no.
What a bummer…
And this music video? C’mon man… someone pick up a damn fiddle.
