She’s doubling down.
The world is continuing to mourn the passing of Dolly Parton, as the legendary country singer, actress, philanthropist and all-around icon passed away on August 25 at the age of 80. In a statement from her team, it was confirmed that Dolly passed away at the Vanderbilt-Ingram Cancer Center here in Nashville, with her nephew Bryan Seaver announcing her death on behalf of the family. Her reps later confirmed that it ended after a “brief battle with cancer.”
At Dolly’s request, a small private service was held for immediate family a few days ago, and her nephew previously revealed to TMZ that Dolly will be buried “in her signature high heels and a comfortable cotton dress” in the mausoleum at Woodlawn Memorial Park and Mausoleum in Nashville, Tennessee, where her late husband Carl Dean is buried.
Of course, tons of tributes, posts and performances have poured in for Dolly, and her impact on the whole world, really, cannot be overstated. It’s just been incredible to see so many people share about how Dolly has touched their lives, far beyond just the music. She was a true light in this world, and it goes well beyond what she did in her career. Dolly was a humanitarian, really, and one of my favorite things about her is that she started her Imagination Library foundation in honor of her father, who never learned to read or write, but as Dolly has put it before, was one of the smartest men she ever knew. I think that says it all about who Dolly was.
While most of the tributes have been really heartfelt and beautiful, there was one response in particular that has baffled many and subsequently received a ton of backlash.
Allie Colleen, the daughter of country legend Garth Brooks and an artist herself, took to Instagram shortly after Dolly’s passing to seemingly call out the millions of fans across the world who were grieving her loss because they didn’t personally know her.
Instead of simply remembering Parton for the trailblazer she was and all the lives she touched throughout her life, Colleen would begin the post by making it all about herself and her father — saying her “greatest fear” is seeing the world mourn Brooks’ eventual death since they don’t know the real him:
“My greatest fear in life is the day my Dad loses his life and I have to see the world mourn a man they never knew the way I knew him…
To the personal friends of Mrs. Dolly you have all my love and condolences today and forever going forward — What a huge, beautiful, special life to have loved and to grieve. Thank you for sharing her with us all.”
Of course, no one is feeling the impact of Dolly’s death more than her family and close personal friends, but Dolly was a beloved public figure who touched the lives of so many people. And posting something like that immediately after Dolly passed is pretty tone-deaf… way to make the passing of an iconic musician and woman about yourself.
She shared the post with the caption:
“What a beautiful privilege it is to mourn.. to grieve is to know you loved deeply and fully. To the woman we all love, and all those who grieve for her— I love you all. Please respect the family and her personal friends.”
Well, even after the massive public backlash, Allie is standing her ground. She responded to several different comments on the post, but this one in particular finds her doubling down on what she said when someone pointed out:
“Maybe I’m confused? How is this a good way of putting it? No one is allowed to be sad except the family? That’s wild.”
Allie explained that she isn’t trying to tell “anyone else how to grieve,” but rather tried to “acknowledge” Dolly’s family:
“This is my account. I am saying I don’t know how to respond to these things in my industry because of my life experiences. I’m not telling anyone else how to grieve. I’m just acknowledging the family. You do you, babe.”
I guess none of the public backlash got to her, and I probably shouldn’t say this in case she sees it, but I’ve been sad since last Tuesday…
Allie later responded to a comment from someone asking what was the best way to support the family in an instance like this, and she basically said she didn’t want support from the general public:
“For me – personally, allow me to grieve privately and personally. I don’t need support from the world when my world ends… my siblings and my moms and I can handle it together, but it is kind of you to offer such support.”
The daughter of fellow country star Trace Adkins seemed to agree with Colleen’s message, saying in the comments:
“I’m more of an avoidant when it comes to fears like this. But that is very, very scary and real for my sisters and I. Thank you for explaining it better than I could.”
I’m not saying their fears aren’t valid, of course the death of a parent is something we all fear and I don’t know what it would be like if your dad was as famous as Garth Brooks, but within the context of the fact that Dolly had just passed, it still feels incredibly bizarre to me to make it about yourself. And to call it your greatest fear in life? Not that he’s gone, but that other people who don’t know him will be sad too?
I get that her father is a beloved public figure (although I don’t think anyone is as universally beloved as Dolly Parton), but there’s a time and a place for everything, and making Dolly’s death about yourself, and your father who is still very much alive, is just really weird.
