James Harden’s Girlfriend Catches Bouquet At Wedding & His Soul Completely Leaves His Body

James Harden
@lyfeofthelitty

Despite widespread praise for his basketball IQ and rave reviews for how he flopped, flailed his arms, and complained his way to three scoring titles and an MVP award, James Harden will never be mistaken for being one of the hardest workers in the NBA. If by “hard work” you mean that whenever he works out, he’s sweating out the booze and what have you from the strip club the night before, then yeah, dude works hella hard.

That may seem like a low blow to The Beard, but please understand that first of all, this is punching above weight for comedic effect, and secondly, it’s important to grasp Harden’s hard-partying lifestyle in the context of what just happened while he attended a wedding. Legend has it that whomever catches the traditional bouquet of flowers that the bride tosses over her shoulder is next in line to tie the knot.

Welp. Harden’s girlfriend — was surprised as any NBA follower to learn that he has one in the first place — happened to be the lucky lady. His reaction says it all.

Harden turns 35 in August. Considering I just saw a 100-year-old World War II veteran marry his 96-year-old sweetheart on the heels of D-Day’s anniversary, I’ll never say it’s too late to find truelove and settle down. Given how he typically carries himself away form the hardwood, though, that is the face of a man who has no plans to become a hubby any time soon.

But who knows? Maybe James was just joshing around and he is tiring of the bachelor life. After all, he’s played for four different teams since 2020 and is due to hit free agency again this summer. His quest for an elusive championship is still alive, yet how many teams would be willing to take a chance on Harden at this point given his likely exorbitant salary demands? I say all this to say that I’m concerned for James Harden. If he’s forced into an early retirement, no strip club in America is safe while he blows off even more steam, agonizing over what could’ve been.

If he can’t get a ring on the court, maybe Harden will be on the hunt for one of the engagement variety here soon. Based on the look plastered on his face post-bouquet catch, though, I wouldn’t count on it. Enjoy some jokes and reactions that were had at Harden’s expense during this trying time for him.

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