Go ahead and preach, Miss Ella Langley.
Over the weekend, Ella opened for Morgan Wallen at his show at Chicago’s Soldier Field, and she did a beautiful rendition of her song “Speaking Terms,” which was included on her smash hit album Dandelion that was released earlier this year. It was written by Ella’s frequent collaborator Joybeth Taylor along with Helene Cronin, and Ella previously explained is about her journey back to God and how much her faith has grown, as she knows he never left her, but it maybe didn’t always feel that way in the moment.
Over the last year or so since she’s shot to fame, Ella has spoken extensively about how difficult that transition has been and how she has discovered a deep faith through that journey.
It opens with her recalling the childlike faith she used to have as a young girl, never questioning God or his plans for her life. It was easy to believe, “as easy as breathing,” and she always knew God was as “close as my next prayer.” But like many of us discover as we get older,” the world will break you down, break your heart and shake your faith”:
“I used to kneel beside my bed at night when I was small
It was easy as breathing, believing wasn’t hard at all
I knew that You were there close as my next prayer
The world will break you down, break your heart
And shake your faith but now you feel so far away
I don’t know who’s to blame
I don’t talk to You as much, maybe that’s part of growing up”
I think most people who are Christians like Ella would tell you they have been through more than one season of life that feels like a real struggle in every aspect, including faith. You never stop believing (some people do) but the circumstances of life make you wonder where God is in all this mess. Her honesty about that subject is important because it’s easy for people to look at her and all of the success she’s had and think it’s always been easy or she always has it all together. Clearly, it’s been quite the opposite, and she’s been very open about that both in her music and throughout various interviews.
The next verse, she very honestly admits that she’s started to use God as a wishing well, so to speak, admitting that she mostly comes around now “when things aren’t working out,” wanting answers and only thinking about herself. If we’re being as honest as she is, I think that’s something a lot of us can relate to, and Ella’s vulnerability in admitting her innermost personal thoughts in a song is what makes her such a special artist:
“I mostly come around now when things aren’t working out
I show up with my questions, my stumbles, and my doubts
Always thinking of myself, and always asking You for help”
In the chorus, she talks about feeling like her prayers are more of a “one way conversation,” feeling like she’s not getting any answers. She knows that a lot of the time, the answers to our prayers are “in the silence,” but having the patience to embrace that in a waiting season is incredibly challenging, at least for me, and all she really wants is a sign that she and God are still on “speaking terms”:
“I carry on this one way conversation
I’m listening but You don’t say a word
If Your answer’s in the silence, I’ll be patient
But it’s hard to know my prayers are being heard
I’m waiting on a whisper, just something to confirm that
You and me are still on speaking terms”
It’s such a beautiful concept and fresh take on the term “speaking terms,” and Ella’s authenticity and admission of her own struggles will surely be a help to anyone else feeling the same way… life is hard, it’s unfortunately all too easy to feel disconnected from God in this modern, digital age we live in (although I think humans have struggled with it since the beginning of time), and I find “Speaking Terms” to be one of the best, most honest and real songs on the album.
And during her set opening for Morgan, Ella explained specifically why she wanted to cut it, after seeing tons of artists try it out in Music City. She explained that her “relationship with Christ” has changed a lot over the last year, admitting there were years, her whole life, actually, where she never even mentioned God, and now, she can’t shut up about the salvation she’s found through Jesus. Ella encouraged everyone there that God will always meet them where they are, even she feels unworthy all the time, though she knows her worth comes from Him, and that’s why she felt it was so important to include this song on her album… so that her fans know that “there’s somebody listening” to them and who loves them no matter what:
“I’ve watched this song get pitched around the whole entire town, I’ve watched so many other artists have this song, how would you feel if I had it on the record? Because it feels like exactly where I am in my life. You know, it feels like my relationship with Christ has changed over the last 365 days, a little more than that.
I went every show of my life without even mentioning His name, to not being able to shut up about it… and I’ve done things in my life that makes me feel not worthy of this song. But I’ll tell one thing, who makes me feel worthy is Him. I’m always worthy. He’s gonna meet me where I’m at, no matter where I’m at.
And that’s why I thought this song was important to put on the record, because I want you to feel that way. I want you to know that, no matter where you are in your life, there’s somebody that’s listening to you, you’re always talking to Him, you just don’t know it.”
It’s been so cool watching Ella grow as an artist and be so open about her faith. She’s a superstar, and to have kept her head on straight and found real faith out of all of this, then to subsequently share it with others on her now passive platform, is really the only thing that matters:
@ellalangleyarchive so happy it’s on the record @Ella Langley #countrymusic ♬ original sound – Ella Langley Archive
Do yourself a favor and check it out if you haven’t yet:
“Speaking Terms”
