There’s Nothing Worse Than Trying To Stop A Fight & Getting Knocked The F**k Out

A group of people in a stadium


College football season is BACK (thank you 8-pound, 6-ounce newborn baby Jesus), and while we’re just a week in, it’s already been… chaotic.

You know how we all though that after the Covid lockdowns of 2020, people would be more full of love? More grateful for the chance to get together in large public spaces? More appreciative of the things we took for granted like live concerts, packed stadiums, hell, even going to bars again with friends?

Well that sure as shit ain’t happening…

People are getting arrested on airplanes, brawling at the Ace Hardware, screaming at each other in the grocery store… it’s anarchy. We all know and love the “Suns in 4” guy, but sports stadiums have been a hot bed for fights in the past six months.

MLB Stadiums, NBA Stadiums, SoFi Stadium, the new home of the LA Rams wasn’t even open for more than a couple hours and fans were already fighting. And we’re not even talking about sports rivalries here, in most cases, people are fighting their fellow fans.

But now, it’s carrying over into the college football season.

We saw the UNC dad try and fight the entire Virginia Tech student section (maybe warranted, who knows?), we saw Alabama fans trading punches with Miami fans, but this one over in Memphis was just plain sad.

Who knows what set it off, who really cares? All I know is the ONE dude trying to calm the situation down (while protecting a girl in the crossfire) got lit up like the 4th of July.

I mean, just OBLITERATED.

Roll the tape:

Like I said, I don’t know what started it, but we see white shirt get shoved and all bets are off.

Backwards hat throws a weak-ass punch, white shirt turns around swinging and just flatlines our poor peacemaker here. He hits the ground like a ton of bricks and a full blown Royal Rumble breaks out.

When he finally gets up (after smashing his face on the concrete) the poor bastard is leaking like a faucet. See what happens when you try and be the good guy? Fuck that noise… just get out of the way.

And then, perhaps the weirdest part of the entire thing….

Dafuq are these two doing? Slow dancing?

I mean, you always want to see cooler heads prevail (no you don’t, don’t lie), but they just looked at each other and decided they didn’t to keep it going.

Nah bro, let’s just dance…

This dude, Slim, claims he’s the guy throwing bombs and that it started over them stepping on his shoes.

When asked why he popped the dude trying to de-escalate, he responded:

And not like anybody cares, but Memphis went on to win the game against Nicholls State, 42-17.

Can’t wait for Week 2…

A beer bottle on a dock



A beer bottle on a dock