I’m dumbfounded, utterly astonished…
The haircut, the watches, the denial, the words coming out of your mouth… all of it.
By now, you’ve undoubtedly seen the incredibly viral footage of Phoenix Suns fan Nick McKellar, AKA the “Suns In 4” guy, who handed down the most embarrassing ass beating the internet has even seen on a shit-talking Nuggets fan with a God-awful haircut, after he poured a beer on him, AND THEN, tried to sucker punch him.
You see, everything is on video these days.
BIG mistake…
Dude got ragdolled… while his bozo of a buddy watched with an equally as awful haircut.
And the joy this brought the interwebs is not to be understated.
Of course the Suns went on to sweep the series, fulfilling the epic prophecy, but Suns guard Devin Booker hooked McKellar up with tickets and a signed jersey, there’s a Nick McKellar Hand Of Doom action figure that was made, people are sending him cash on Venmo… he’s a national hero.
Live look at the scene during Game 1 of the Suns/Clippers series this afternoon:
But then here’s where this gets even more hilarious.
The guy that took the comically one-sided beating, Marty, did an interview claiming that he was already bleeding before it started, that he was “scratched” on the nose, and that only the last punch landed.
And since he didn’t have black eyes, his nose wasn’t busted open, and there was no way in hell that he was “demolished,” as anybody who watched the video would describe it.
I mean, I don’t see blood. You tell me…
He went even further to say that he was black out drunk, that the guy was “like 40 pounds” bigger than him and that he would like a rematch in the boxing ring. They then brought in a diamond detector because apparently him having fake jewelry was more disrespectful than the ass-whopping he got.
Really guy? That’s quite a lot of details for being black out drunk…
I swear I thought the guy was going to shave his head and move to another town after that legendary beatdown, but apparently taking one L wasn’t enough. How are you THAT delusional? And why are you wearing four watches? Can somebody just answer me that?
You poured a beer on a guy, you tried to sucker punch him from behind, you got your ass handed to you for it, and your buddy sat there like the coward he is and watched. But sure, you keep telling your side of the story like the entire planet hasn’t watch you get wrecked 15 times already.
And let’s not act like every Nuggets fan on planet Earth wouldn’t like to knock your teeth in too…
Watch the full interview below, but be warned, it might make your blood boil.
