Oregon Man With “Not Drunk, Avoiding Potholes” Bumper Sticker Arrested… For Driving Drunk

A man in front of a car

Gonna have to scrape that bumper sticker off now.

An Oregon man apparently tried to throw the police off his trail with a “Not Drunk, Avoiding Potholes” sticker on his Volkswagon Jetta. Haha, classic, look at the sense of humor on this guy.

The only problem? He was EXTREMELY drunk.

According to KOIN, Jeffrey Cannon blew past a sheriff’s deputy in Clackamas County, Oregon going between 80 and 90 mph. Then, when officers pulled him over, his vehicle rolled backwards into the deputy’s patrol car.

Now at this point the deputy probably had a pretty good idea that the bumper sticker was probably not accurate – but all doubts were erased when they spotted a half-empty Busch Light in the cupholder and several empty beer cans in the floor of the car. (Oh, and they also found some cocaine in the console).

When the deputy asked Cannon why he let his car roll into the police cruise, Cannon replied that he “didn’t know that happened.”

Officers performed a field sobriety test, which Cannon apparently didn’t exactly pass with flying colors (trying to dodge potholes while you’re walking too, bud?) and eventually blew a .22 on the breathalyzer, almost 3 times the legal limit.

So despite what his bumper sticker said, Cannon was ultimately arrested for DUI – because apparently you can’t believe everything you read on the back of a VW Jetta these days.

According to the police report, Cannon reported that he was “planning on partying.”

Sounds to me like he got the party started just a little too early…

A beer bottle on a dock


A beer bottle on a dock