Marion County Sheriff's Office/CBS 12

Florida Duo (Not Florida Georgia Line) Named Dumbest Thieves For Their Burglary Methods

I couldn’t help myself.

When you see “dumb Florida duo” my brain immediately went to Florida Georgia Line. I honestly can’t help it. I can’t control my brain flow. I know you’re with me.

However, this is not about Florida Georgia Line and their dog poo music, but rather about burglaries from a couple morons named Robert and Marcus (pictured above). 

This duo decided to go on a theft and burglary rampage around Marion County stealing stuff like lotto tickets and cigs – very on brand for these Florida Man stories.

CBS 12 in Florida awarded these two with the title of Dumbest Thieves of the Week because as they broke into various businesses, they left behind a plethora of belongings. This included but was not limited to: their wallets, driver’s license, shoes, tools, etc.

Naturally, this made catching them incredibly simple for authorities.

I bet Robert and Marcus, who are in jail facing 14 charges, could make a song better than “Swerve” before their sentencing hearing.

** warning: watching the video below might make your brain liquefy.

Whiskey Riff is the most entertaining country site…ever.