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Zac Brown Doubles Down On Sh*tty Album With Even Sh*ttier Surprise Solo Album

Just when you think Zac Brown couldn’t possibly suck any more, he continues to prove you wrong.

As if The Owl wasn’t bad enough, Zac Brown went solo for this one (clearly this is where the rest of the band draws the line) and it’s bad. Really bad. The immediate standout track for me is this little diddy called “Swayze.” Here’s a little preview of the chorus to get your feet wet:

“I can’t be your Tom Cruise bitch, I’m Patrick Swayze. Every time I get a new bitch, I need a new bitch. I’m about to ghost on you bitch.”

Riveting stuff Zac, absolutely riveting. Way to defile the name of Patrick Swayze with this trash.

Here’s Zac’s explanation:

“I’ve always been influenced by all genres and never want to limit myself to a single type of music. I love my band and love creating music with them, but we all pursue our own thing in addition to what we put out together and support each other’s creative endeavors. This album is an outlet for me to explore pop music, a broad category in its own right, without expectation.”

This is explicitly a pop solo project, but for fucks sake Zac, be better. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to try out some pop music, some EDM stuff, chase a dream, whatever you want to call this mid-life crisis you’re having right now, but “I need a new bitch” is the best you got? Fuck off. Get your ass back in the studio and give us another “Colder Weather.”

It’s sad really. At this point it’s pretty clear he needs some kind of professional help, probably an intervention, and definitely a good smack upside the head. Somebody better do something before it’s too late. I feel like we’re about two weeks away from the debut of a massive Mike Tyson-esque face tattoo or something.

Anyways, here’s another one called “Time.” It sucks too…

A beer bottle on a dock



A beer bottle on a dock