Police Rescue Drunk Guy From Freezing Chicago River At 1AM After He “Decided To Go For A Swim”

A man holding a rope

Drunk people. Drunk people everywhere.

Chicago police had to save a man from the freezing Chicago River at 1AM Tuesday morning after he drank too much and “decided to go for a swim.” GO FOR A SWIM. In case you weren’t aware, Chicago is fucking freezing this time of year.

The 29-year-old man was saved near Dearborn Street and Wacker Drive.

“We ran down and someone threw a life raft to him,” said Officer Michael Kelly. “As we were pulling him out that is when we noticed that he was going limp and pulling him up, it was almost dead weight. We pulled him up over the railing.”

According to ABC Chicago, officers said the man was highly intoxicated. He told investigators he just left a party at the House of Blues when he decided to hop a fence and then jump into the frigid river to take a swim. It is not known how long he was in the water before he was rescued and rushed to Northwestern Memorial Hospital, where his condition stabilized.

Officers also told CBS Chicago that “As soon as he jumped over the fence, he jumped into the water, thinking he was going to reach the other side, and he said as soon as he got into the water, he felt he was in there for like an hour.”

A black coffee maker on a counter

Liquid courage.

image via CBS Chicago

A beer bottle on a dock


A beer bottle on a dock