KFC Rewards Family With $11,000 After They Name New Baby After The Colonel

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Back in August, KFC offered to throw some tuition money to the first family to named their baby after the Colonel.

The chicken chain launched a contest where participants were could win the 11k if their baby was the first baby born on September 9th, the same day the Colonel was born. Oh, and they had to name it Harland.

Well, somebody did exactly that…

On Monday, KFC wrote, “I’m as pleased as pumpkin punch to announce the winner of our Baby Harland Naming Contest and the Harland who will be ushering in an all-new generation of Harlands, little Harland Rose.”

First of all, $11,000 ain’t going to pay for a fucking pencil by the time Harland gets to college and second of all, how many other Harlands are out there now that weren’t born first, but have to go through life knowing that the day they were born, they were part of a stupid KFC publicity stunt? Also, you had a girl? Harlyn, maybe. Harland? That’s a great-great grandpa name if I’ve ever heard one.

Way to go mom and dad, sounds like we’re off to a great start.

A beer bottle on a dock



A beer bottle on a dock