People Are Losing Their Sh*t Over Cotton Candy Grapes

Cotton candy grapes.

I’ve been looking for these forever, and only had them once. They are fantastic. But since then, never seen them, anywhere.

A kitchen with a sink and a toaster oven

The cotton candy grape is like some mythical figure that descends upon us for a few weeks a year before vanishing. WHERE THE FUCK DO I FIND THESE? Well, I guess Sam’s Club is about to start selling the wacky fruit that tasted like a carnival classic. This starts on September 10th.

According to NY Daily News, cotton candy grapes are an actual fruit — and taste strangely similar to the sickeningly sweet carnival treat. The oddly-flavored fruits were created by Grapery, a California-based table grape grower several years back, but they recently starting sweeping the East Coast. They’re only in season from Aug. 10 through Sept. 20, so fans go wild when they’re available — or are sold out at their local markets.

A quick Twitter search of these grapes brings back people speaking of them like their most satisfying sexual experiences. Others don’t trust them. 

You can eat them as is, or freeze them for a killer frozen treat. I’ve even seen people freeze them, then place them in champagne or vodka. I don’t know anything, I just want to see them again in person.

A beer bottle on a dock


A beer bottle on a dock