40 Thoughts You Have While Destroying Your Liver With Tequila Shots

Tequila. I love you so hard. I hate you so hard.

The journey from sober to drunk on tequila is one filled with many thoughts, confusion, out of body experiences.

Here’s what’s going on in your head…

40. Not drinking tonight.

39. This bar sucks, why am I here?

38. Ok, one drink.

37. But, NO shots for me tonight.

36. Oh shit, I didn’t think the bartender would see me that quickly. Uhhhh, I don’t know what to get… TEQUILA.

A man and a woman

35. Fuck.

34. Ew, here it comes.

33. I need a lime. Lime. Please, lime anyone? Lime? Lemon.

32. I might as well use some salt too.

31. OMG, was that lighter fluid?

30. I still feel it in my stomach.

29. I wonder how much it costs them to make a bottle of this stuff.

28. Not very much…

27. We should probably do another shot.

26. Hm… shot #2 was better.

25. I love this song.

A kitchen with a sink and a toaster oven

24. Time for shot #3.

23. Cheaper the tequila, better the time it seems.

22. I love this song, let’s do another shot.

21. Imagine drinking one of these on the rocks…

A kitchen with a sink and a toaster oven

20. I’m gonna yack.

19. Hangover is going to be a bitch.

18. Should chug a water.

17. Not gonna chug a water.

16. We should probably do another shot.

15. Fuck, this is good now, right?

14. 6 shots is my max tonight.

13. Pretty drunk, should start making vacation plans with my friends that will never happen.

12. It’s taking over my body.

11. Who’s gonna blackout with me? I need a table to dance on.

A kitchen with a sink and a toaster oven

10. Another shot. Should I start taking off my clothes? Yup.

9. Is it just me or is this stuff getting smoother.

8. Keep ’em coming. Lost count.

7. Life is great. Man, this is the life.

6. Gonna tell my friends how much I love them. Every last one of them.

5. Then I’m gonna smile at myself in the bathroom mirror.

4. One more shot.

3. I should probably just scream “woo!” right now.

2. How many shots is that?

A kitchen with a sink and a toaster oven

1. I can’t see.

A beer bottle on a dock


A beer bottle on a dock