To The Girl Who Needs To Be Reminded Of What She Deserves

Growing up I’ve learned to never settle. Never settle because I deserve the best. It’s NOT a bad thing to set high expectations for yourself when finding a guy to be with for life. Trust me, it’ll be a better life for you if you set those standards sooner than later.

I currently live in a house full of girls. I am constantly hearing or seeing girls fall for guys that aren’t even close to meeting even the lowest of expectations that any person should have. I see girls settling for a number of reasons. Maybe it’s because the girl just wants someone to be there so they don’t have to be alone. Maybe it’s been a while since they felt anything for a guy so they are over being single. Maybe they are settling because they are so focused on who he used to be. They are hoping the old, good boyfriend they once knew will come back because the memories with him cut too deep to let go of.

Whatever the reason is, she’s setting. She’s settling for a halfway love when they deserve the WHOLE thing. Don’t ever settle for a guy who treats you right 3/7 days of the week because one day the other 4 days will come back to haunt you.  It’s time to stop justifying his actions and step back to remember who you are, what you really want, and what you DESERVE.

A kitchen with a sink and a toaster oven

Let me first remind you, there’s so much more to a guy than looks. If you find yourself head over heels into a guy solely because he’s the hotshot in town, I hate to break it to you girl but you’re in for some heartbreak. This guy might be really good for Instagram but your heart- that’s a different story. I’m not saying all super cute guys are bad because they aren’t- I’m just saying don’t let that be your only reason you’re staying with him. Something I’ve found to be true is that physical attractiveness can develop as you get to know someone. There was this guy that I never would’ve seen myself with- ever. But after months of just being friends, hanging out, and getting to know him I found that he suddenly was so attractive to me. With that said, if there’s a guy out there who’s personality and heart you love, don’t let the lack of physical attraction (thus far) stop you for all that could come. Obviously, don’t force anything but DO give it a shot.

For the girls settling because they are over the single life- I hear ya but please wait it out. I was almost there. I was so over being single that I almost got into a relationship with the wrong guy. This guy was nowhere near meetings even the lowest of my expectations. He was good with his words, had a cute face, and could make me laugh. He was convenient and it was just the easy thing to be with him and call it a day…that is until real life hit us and we realized we’d been fooling ourselves to try and make something work between us. All that time I was settling for a good laugh, go-to company, and a cute face but also a guy who’d run like hell the second it got hard. I was so over being single that I let myself think THAT was love. Wow was I wrong, thankfully that is not what love is. Love doesn’t run at the first sign of trouble, it endures. Love isn’t shallow. Love is not angry or selfish and it’s sad to think that some girls, like I once had, are settling for that kind of love.

I’d rather be single than in the wrong relationship. 

My final point, stop justifying his actions. Like I mentioned, 3 out of the 7 days of a week is not enough to be treated the way you deserve. If you’re devoting life to this person, it should be a 24/7 kind of thing not just when you feel like it. Maybe those 3 days you feel like you really are in the best relationship possible, but I’m telling you those short 3 days will not withstand the 4 other days of the week when you’re put to the side. Don’t justify his actions of Friday with the cheap flowers he brings you Monday morning. You deserve more.

There is one thing you should be selfish about in life. You should be selfish when it comes to thinking about what YOU want in a boyfriend/husband. It’s okay to set high standards and wait for nothing but the best. Don’t be the girl who thinks every guy is prince charming just because he called you pretty once.

Ladies, you deserve a man who

1.  …will love you for all that you are. The good, bad, and ugly.

2. …won’t let you fall asleep angry.

3. …goes out of his way to show you how much he cares.

4. …makes you feel wanted, not annoying.

5. …fights for the relationship just as much as you do.

6. …tells you how he feels instead of keeping you wondering.

7. …doesn’t run the second things get hard.

8. …asks you out on real dates.

9. …will let you be yourself. Ugly faces, snorting laughs, funny (but not really funny) jokes you tell and all that comes with you.

10. …doesn’t get mad at you for just trying to love them.

11. …picks you wildflowers just because and not only when he know he screwed up.

12. …slow dances in the rain with you.

13. …truly listens to you and loves every second of it.

14. …wants to know every little thing about you.

15. …encourages you to dream big and doesn’t put your big dreams down.

16. …knows how to communicate their feelings.

17. …will be your crying shoulder when you’re going through hell.

18. …you can fully trust to take care of your heart.

19. …thinks you’re as good as it gets and isn’t on the lookout for something better.

20. …is looking for love, not a one night stand.

21. …will wait for you.

22. …will fight for you no matter how much you push away.

23. …wants God at the center of your relationship.

24. …thinks you’re the most beautiful girl in the world.

25. …will do anything to make sure that you are his girl for the rest of his life.

Wait for the guy that looks at you like this.

A group of people in the snow



A beer bottle on a dock


A beer bottle on a dock