I Skipped Eric Church For My Girlfriend. This Is My Story

Eric Church leaning against a wall

I wish this story had more of a happy ending. It doesn’t.

Eric Church is currently in the middle of an epic run of shows as part of the “Holdin’ My Own Tour” The 3 plus hour set spans 5 albums and 35 plus songs from the legend in the making known as Eric Church. If you ask anybody who has seen Eric perform live, they’ll tell you as well. Quite simply, he’s the best there is.

As a member of Whiskey Riff (I say that like we’re a country boy band, but whatever) we get to see a ton of concerts, and for this particular one, Eric’s camp to set us up with 4 tickets. Until we confirmed a few days before the show…

*Sidenote: Things get fucked up all the time. Always confirm a couple days before anything. You’ll save yourself a world of trouble and embarrassment.

“Yes, I have you down for 3 tickets.”

A kitchen with a sink and a toaster oven

Now I have two options:

  1. Tell the girl that I just started seeing a couple months ago, “Sorry, there’s only 3 tickets, but if you want to meet up after, I’m down.”
  2. Tell her, “Sorry, there was a problem and we can’t go see Eric Church anymore.”

I chose the second one.

Although she told me to just go without her, I made plans with her and I wasn’t going to bail on her. Call me a man of integrity, call me an idiot, call me both, but I just wasn’t going to do it. Long story short, concert day arrived and Steve found 4 tickets in the envelope, as originally planned, but I’m fairly far away from the concert venue at the time. I missed the show.

A kitchen with a sink and a toaster oven

Once the agony of missing the show subsided and the dust in my empty heart settled, I thought to myself, how can I use this to my advantage, (integrity out the window).

Here is where the real story begins.

“But I missed the Eric Church show for you.”

That’s right folks. I use it and I use it often. Whenever I can sense a fight about to start or her about to drag me into some conversation about my poor communication skills, my lack of clean laundry, lack of health insurance, basically my lack of all normal adulting skills or whatever other stupid thing I do that she complains about, I hit her with the atomic bomb, the ace of spades, the finishing move, in fact, right now I just call it “The Wrecking Ball.”

“But I missed the Eric Church show for you.”

I’m not proud of it, but relationships are made up of tiny little battles and most of the time, as guys, we lose.

It’s common practice to let her have 9 out of 10 and save up your one victory for something big, something important. Not me. I win them all now. Don’t get me wrong, I gave up a lot. When you have the country music equivalent of denying a child his trip to Disney World, it’s initially a tough pill to swallow. However, now, it’s just smooth sailing.

I know it’ll run out eventually, but I’ll probably just get health insurance like a normal adult when it does and that’ll buy me another few months of living on easy street.

Game, set, match.

A kitchen with a sink and a toaster oven

A beer bottle on a dock


A beer bottle on a dock