6 1/2 Reasons Getting Drunk On A Plane Is The Only Way To Fly

“It’s Mardi Gras up in the clouds, I’m up so high I may never come down.”

As soon as the wheels are up, I’m looking for flight attendant and her magical cart of liquid bliss. Getting drunk on a plane is the best way to make use of what’s usually a terrible situation. Have you ever flown Spirit Airlines? You have to be drunk to survive a flight in that dump. If you want make air travel a pleasant endeavor, kick back and have a drink.

Here’s why:

1. The excitement.

You’re going on vacation and about to have the time of your life. Nothing is more appropriate than a drink or two or ten. Timing is key though. You want to have that perfect buzz going the second you touch the ground.


2. There is nothing else to do.

Read a book? Sleep? Stare out the window? Psh.

3. It’s fun.

In the words of Chase Rice, “I like drinking, cuz it’s fun.” It’s even more fun when you’re on a plane.

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4. You’ll loosen up.

Planes are uncomfortable as hell. A bunch of people packed into a flying tin can, who can only stand up when they tell you. Knock a few back, buy a round for your neighbors or that cute guy/girl you’ve been eyeballing since you first walked on and start a conversation. Everyone will be better off.

5. The view.

The hell with a rooftop bar, I’m drinking at 35,000 feet. That’s a view.

6. Drinking games are on another level.

Ever heard of the Wade Boggs Challenge?


6.5 It’s Free.

Depending on the flight, (mostly international) but take advantage if you can.